feeling responsible

Are you ready for more love in your relationship?

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Are you ready for more love in your relationship? As a marriage therapist and couples counselor, I regularly listen to couples share the pain they experience when they don’t get the love they want. Often, especially in the beginning of couples counselling, there can be a fair amount of focus  on how the pain is the other person’s fault, i.e. the result of what the other person is doing “wrong” or failing to do. Similar …

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Improve your happiness quotient by learning this mantra

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Improve your happiness quotient by learning this mantra Do you worry about your loved ones  being disappointed, or feeling bad in some shape or form? Do try to save your children from feeling/experiencing pain and disappointment in life? Do you work hard to manage your loved one’s feelings so he or she doesn’t  get sick, relapse, become depressed again, get triggered into some other painful place? Are you the super attentive and kind friend always …

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When you can’t stop criticizing each other – how to stop the blame game

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When you can’t stop criticizing each other – how to stop the blame game Do you ever think or say “I can never do anything right!” or “No matter what I do, it’s never good enough for you!” when you’re involved in yet another squabble with your partner? When Harry and Jen came to see me for couple’s counselling in Burnaby they were both very frustrated. Over the last couple of years their bickering had …

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“Pillow Talk” Part 2: addressing orgasm difficulties

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“Pillow Talk” Part 2: addressing orgasm difficulties Have you ever faked an orgasm? If yes, please take a moment and acknowledge to yourself why you answered the famous question “Did you come?” with a lie. As a sex therapist and relationship counsellor I help couples address this questions and the potential surrounding anxieties in a way that is nurturing and supportive rather than anxiety provoking and frustrating. When the question “Did you come?” turns into …

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How to stop the Power Struggle in your relationship

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How to stop the Power Struggle in your relationship When couples consider marriage counselling or relationship therapy, they’re often   gridlocked or stuck in a power struggle. A very common issue that surfaces in couple’s counselling sessions is “He or she is so controlling, I can’t stand it anymore.” Two things may be happening if you’re partner has a need to control, i.e. decide how things get done or what you’re going to be doing. First …

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How to stop having certain arguments over and over again…

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How to stop having certain arguments over and over again… Do you struggle to understand your partner at times? Maybe when you met and were freshly in love, the fact that you were different was exciting and interesting. But when the novelty wears off, it’s easy to move from admiring a particular trait to finding it irritating or “wrong.” This can then become a place where you don’t see eye to eye, your frustrations rub …

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